Thankfully the dark cloud has lifted and after three weeks he has finally come out his depression. For a moment there I was a bit worried that we would end up in the hospital. He is back to his delightful self and has been actively reading on his own without being told. Reading use to be a hot issue. He still has his moments but he's trying to help himself more and more. This is a great feeling and it reassures me that he wants to get better. Usually I was the one trying to figure out his triggers and how to deal with them. Now I see him trying to figure out his own coping skills to help with the voices.
I've learned one thing about him last week. Something that tells me that I'm on the right track. He came to me with an English assignment from school. The assignment is to write a short story. His idea for the short story is about his life with mental illness. We all know that stories like this are far from short but he is determined to tell his story. So I helped him introduce his characters and helped him write a short synopsis. He was quite impressed that his classmates were interested and anticipating to read the whole story. What I learned is that he's starting to embrace his illness and trying to make it positive. I'm very proud.
I can stand in front of an audience and tell my story over and over. My story is never the same and often I'm more emotional on some days than most but; the day my son stands up and tells his own story in front of an audience will be my last and final time. It will be the day that I will completely be able to share my emotions without holding back. I will be able to break down and feel what I have been holding back for many years. His OWN story will be the brick that breaks the wall that has blocked the hidden pain and emotion that I have felt since this journey of ours began. Daniel's OWN story will help many people see that there is hope in the midst of all the pain and struggle one has to endure when living with a mental illness.
I'm a mother with an agenda to save her son from the grips of his mental illness and stop stigma so that those who suffer in silence can seek help without fearing the worse. Join me on this roller coaster ride..you're no longer alone.